Luv & Glass
Breakup and Relationship Issues
by Tigress Luv, The Breakup Guru & by Glass
can like us at our Mending Broken Hearts Page on FaceBook
You can also like Tigress Luv at her Tigress Luv Facebook page
|Advice on Relationship,
Breakup, Commitmentphobia, Abuse, Codependency, Narcissist and Narcissism, Breaking Up, Poetry, Poems, articles, blogs, newsletters, books and more...
Love, break up grief, and relationship issue advice for breaking up and mending a broken heart
Hey, Just STOP Loving Them! Easy, Right?
We fall Out of Love?...
OUT OF LOVE? IMPOSSIBLE!
by Tigress Luv
In our last newsletter we compared the grief
of a breakup to that of the grief of a death of a loved one. We spoke
that grief for one whom we have lost through death was socially
acceptable, but that most people frowned on grieving over a breakup. We
also talked about how when one dies they do not purposefully and
intentionally withdraw their love and affection from you as one does
when they walk out or abandon you and your relationship.
One subscriber emailed that when she had gone through her breakup she
did not receive the sympathy that she would have had her loved one
died. She said, "It is so frustrating! There are so many more
feelings involved when you are left alone and feel the loss of someone
who wanted to leave. You also cannot put pictures up of that person and
it be socially acceptable!"
This puts one who is grieving over the intentional abandonment of their
partner in a very difficult position. First off, this subscriber is
dead-on right. You are not 'allowed' to put up pictures, make a shrine,
have a memorial for closure, or feel the empathetic and sympathetic
support of others. This forces us to try to 'fall out of love' with
someone, which is an impossible feat. You cannot force yourself to not
love someone anymore than you can force yourself to love someone. Love
is a natural emotional reaction to another in our life, and not an
object or a substance that you can just 'return' or toss out.
Unfortunately, but ironically, the more you
try to force yourself to 'fall out of love' with someone the more you
will actually love that very person. It's a sad trick that our heart
and our mind play on us.
When we are not allowed to grieve after a breakup it leaves us in a
position of feeling that we should just 'stop' loving them now that the
relationship has come to a close. Well-meaning friends and family may
innocently say things like, 'get over it', 'move on', or 'he/she was
never good enough for you anyway'. They don't mean any harm; they only
mean to help. But their words just make it worse!
The best thing - and the wisest thing - you can do is to just totally
accept that you are in love with your ex and that you may always be in
love with your ex. Stop trying to 'fall out of love' and bring the love
back into your heart. Your heart is a huge place and can hold many
different loves for many different people. You don't have to stop
loving someone just because you are no longer romantically involved
with him or her.
Accepting the fact that you love your ex doesn't mean that you will
never get over the pain of losing them! In fact, the acceptance
actually helps you get 'through' the grief and on your way to a sunnier
day. So go ahead and love them. It's okay!
usual, our readers are entitled to join the Lifted Hearts Break
Up Support Forums & Community at a special, reduced rate at http://liftedhearts.com
For more information on the getting over a breakup and going through
changes please visit my site: http://overabreakup.com
Inspiration, Poem or Quote:
"One love isn't all consuming, but one heartbreak can be. "~
Tigress Luv, The Breakup Guru
Prayer or Thought:
dealing with grief remember that grief is like a tunnel. You can't go
'around' it, you can't skip 'over' it; you must go through it. There is
a light at the end of this tunnel. Trust me on that one." ~Tigress Luv
a reminder that our Breakup
Support Forums & Community has room for you!
Membership is only $19 to YOU at http://liftedhearts.com !
Thank you for reading this week's newsletter! As always, we welcome
feedback and new ideas for future newsletters.
Have a great week everyone!
published by Tigress Luv & Glass Slipper Publishing, the Breakup Gurus. For more
breakup advice and forums please join us at the Lifted Hearts Breakup
Support Forums & Community at http://liftedhearts.com.
Stop your breakup here!
Thank you for visiting! Tigress
Luv, The Breakup Guru
| AFTERSHOCK MAGAZINE - The FREE online magazine for help with surviving the narcissist:
2017 Tigress Luv, http://glass-slipper-publishing.com and http://liftedhearts.com, The
Network All Rights Reserved -
Stop a Break Up and Get Him or Her, Girlfriend or Boyfriend, Back,
and mend a broken heart and get over a break up - Stop
Questions about this website? Write the Break
(Please do not write for relationship breakup advice. Thank you!)